Let’s Party

I bet you thought I forgot all about you kids out there suffering through your break-ups. Well, I didn’t. But as I explained earlier, this is a process, a cycle, and I wanted to give you lots of time to go back and forth between disgusting and cleansing before I prepared you for the next phase.

That and I’ve been really busy. I mean, I did run a marathon and all.

And now that I am no longer training (who are we kidding? I barely trained) and you are through cycling – let’s party.
The celebration stage is crucial – not just because if you continue to drink alone people are going to start to suggest you have a problem – but because it is time for you to be happy . Why are you still wallowing in this break-up? Why are you still eating whole packages of Oreo Double Stuffs and crying because your ex didn’t want to be with you? Why would you want to be with someone who didn’t want to be with you? Who didn’t recognize just how amazing you are and how freakishly lucky he was to land you? Seriously?

He did you a favor. He clearly wasn’t who you thought he was and thank goodness he didn’t waste another day of your life. You should be thanking him. But since that would mean reaching out to him and believe me, we aren’t there yet, let’s get gussied up, call our friends, and celebrate that you are no longer wasting your life with that loser.

Can’t buy any of that? Okay, well, then how about this? Imagine how pissed/shocked/upset/regretful he is going to feel when he finds out (either through the grapevine or by stalking your Facebook page) that you are over him and already back out there – having fun and looking amazing?

That’s my girl.

Also, and believe me I know this from experience, you aren’t ever going to get laid home alone, sitting on your couch, drinking wine straight from the box. A necessary part of the healing process is getting some strange. Even if it is just a hot and heavy make-out session in a dark alleyway with a  little under the shirt action, feeling sexy and desired by the opposite (or same – no judgment) sex goes a long way.

A word of warning here, however. As you are well aware, you are still emotionally raw right now. Couple that with the oxytocin your body is going to produce after a few minutes in that dark alley and you may start thinking you have found the one. Spoiler alert: He’s not the one. He’s not perfect or the man you have been waiting your whole life for. Hell, it is very likely you won’t even remember his name in a couple of months. He's a means to an end. He can't even count as a transitional person because he isn't going to be around that long. 

The celebration phase is not the time to find your next boyfriend.

It is the time to remember just how amazing you are (with or without a guy) and to celebrate all you have to offer.

So what are you waiting for?