Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Guys and Their Drinks With Guest Blogger Gigi

A lot of women think they can tell what sort of man they are up against by his shoes, or clothes or hair. My mother thinks you can tell a lot about a man by the way he treats his mother. Cher once sang that “it's in his kiss.” I don’t really have an opinion on the matter. Why would I? I know so little about men I am reading a Dr. Phil book to help me get a date.

My good friend Gigi thinks you can size up a man by the cocktail in his hand. She should know, Gigi, in addition to just being plain fabulous, also blogs about drinks she has enjoyed at Martini Talk. So without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, I give you Gigi:

I used to think you could judge a guy by his shoes. Vans: suburban, self-brooder. Nikes: city boy. Black shoes: club guys. Dr. Martens: super cool. That was a while ago, back in college. Recently, a few friends asked me to compare guys to cocktails, since I blog about them so much (cocktails that is, not guys.) So here goes:

Jack and Coke: the guys that thinks he looks cool, but is really just trying to get wasted and take you home for a little…

Dirty Martini: You got to commend anyone that can get one of these bad boys down, but from my experience, guys that drink dirty martinis tend to be major douches (sorry, its my favorite word lately). Guys: don’t be offended – every girl likes to date an asshole every now and then.

Wine: Now we’re getting somewhere. If you can order a glass of wine and know what you’re talking about – points for you. You may even be into commitment (or you could just be gay). However, like Paul Giammatti in Sideways said, if you order Merlot, I’m leaving.

Captain and Ginger: Someone once told me that if you order your cocktail with ginger ale you must be from the East Coast. I’m not quite sure what that means, but I like to think that pairing your Captain with ginger ale means you are somewhat of a contrarian. Expect the unexpected with this one.

Goose and Soda: A guy with good taste – enough said.

Anything Gin: The Dr. Martens of alcohol, gin stands the test of time, and can give you either that bad boy buzz or a Rat Pack coolness. Either way, a gin guy is super cool.

2 comments:

TheNYCourier said...

Clever, witty, and true, in the spirit of this blog.

I flatter myself by thinking I'm an "Anything Gin" man, and I would hope to find the same one day. Or, at least, a guy who can order a bottle of Barolo that we could share. Although these comparisons of men to alcohol makes me realize how much I love alcohol and hate men...

b3ar said...

I used to be a Jack and coke (except it was Crown Royal)...but now I don't drink at all.

What does that say about me?